Attention, Lately

Where I'm putting it. Register for this month's Second Sunday; topic: WRITING.

I’ve been up since 4:30 am when my daughter and her friends left my house for Senior Sunrise, a tradition here where rising seniors drive around town in decorated cars blaring music, beeping horns, and woo-hooing. Given I didn’t go to bed until almost 11, I should be junk right now, but the sun is out and I’m grateful and caffeinated.

Grateful because for so long, I wanted to have a home where Alma could bring her friends—big groups of them, if she wanted—to hang out or spend the night or whatever else. I wanted the same for me: to be able to have friends over comfortably, host dinners or barbecues, have a place for loved ones to stay. You don’t realize that your kids won’t be kids forever, or I didn’t—those early days go so slow, but then the years speed by and somehow, you blink, and you’re talking about SATs and college visits.

Since her dad and I separated fourteen years ago, we’ve lived in rentals—always condos or apartments—and that’s been fine, we’ve had lovely spaces. But I wanted her to have a place she called home, that we’d get to live into fully, and as she entered high school and time clicked on, I worried I’d miss my chance.

I didn’t, though. We got our home, just in the nick of time last fall. This weekend, I had my first backyard gathering with my friends, and last night, Alma had her girlfriends sleepover so they could decorate my Jeep (impressively!?) and wake up before dawn.

Get yourself a hammock.

I can get very tripped up on all the worries and anxieties I have about the future, work, projects, people I love, my resentments and judgments, the world, some dumb argument on Instagram—those things can consume me and grow bigger than all that’s good and right. So easily, this can happen, every day. But I’m working very, very hard now to double-down on presence, to be a real steward of my attention. It feels harder than ever given how we live, but I’m determined.

Practically, this has meant a few things—sharing in case it’s helpful. I Brick my phone a lot. I’ve made reading my default state again, versus scrolling or half-watching shows, or whatever else. And, I’m meditating daily for 20 minutes using the Waking Up app. (There’s nothing special about this app in terms of meditation; I’ve subscribed for years because I find the conversations there invaluable, and they happen to have a “Daily Meditation” feature, and I like Sam’s voice.) I’ve historically been a half-hearted meditator, but something in me (and my friend Elena Brower’s persistent voice) is saying it’s time to take it seriously.

Strategically, I’m sorting out my work priorities, and that includes how I’d like to show up here, and what is of most value to you. When I started writing here in 2023, it was sort of crowded, but nothing like it is today. It’s beautiful that Substack has provided such an opportunity for writers and creators—incredible, really, to have access to so much and so many. But I also sense (and subscription rates would affirm) that we’re all, collectively, full up. There’s simply too much, everywhere we turn. I don’t have a solution for this, and I’m not changing anything right now, but I’m paying attention—both as a reader, and a writer—and want you to know that.

My priority for now is still to write (or talk; I love the Substack live feature!) about sobriety, recovery, relationships, and writing. Later this week, I’ll be publishing a Dig List: Summer Reading Edition.

Today, I’ll leave you with a few highlights from my reading life, which has been FULL OF RICHES. I absolutely loved Maria Semple’s new book, Go Gentle. How is she so smart and funny, my God. Similarly, I cannot stop talking about Famesick. I didn’t think I’d be into it (not because I don’t like Lena Dunham, I do, I just thought: eh). It’s excellent. Last, I read Ann Patchett’s latest novel, Whistler, over the weekend—wonderful, tender, heartwarming (and despite the cover, not about a horse!)—and then listened to this interview with her on The Book Show, which was such good medicine. She talks about the book, but also her writing process, her family, and (my favorite) her proclivity to see the good in things and people, and what that’s meant for her in life.

More soon. xo

Laura

Offerings

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