Another Burning

Reflections on new sobriety and heartbreak.

First: If you are new to sobriety or already sober but really need some support, structure, and community, The Sober 90 begins July 1. I wish something like this would have been available when I needed it. Learn more and grab a spot.

Also, I found out yesterday that Sarah Silverman talked about The Luckiest Club on her podcast. What?

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Last week, I asked you all for stories of surviving heartbreak. I’m still reading through them, but thank you, thank you. They’ve made me feel less alone and more hopeful—which is what I really needed: the hope. Because one of the hardest parts of being in a lot of pain is feeling like it’ll never end—that you’ll remain frozen in your emotional hell for the rest of your life. I even wrote about this phenomenon in Push Off from Here. It’s called The End of History Illusion, wherein we regard the present as a watershed moment at which we’ve become the person we’ll be for the rest of lives.¹ Unfortunately, having all the information in the world doesn’t keep us from our humanity; I’ve still asked friends, almost daily, to remind me that I won’t feel this way forever. Your stories help. Keep them coming.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how going through this feels a lot like new sobriety, so I’m going to talk about that today.

This piece is for paid subscribers. Folks have asked why I’m doing that more lately, and it’s because it provides a layer of privacy and protection that I need right now. Of course, anyone can get access if they want, but the little fence helps me. As always, if you cannot afford a subscription right now, please email admin@lauramckowen.com and request a comped subscription. We’ll grant it for six months, no questions asked.