26 Comments

This, to me, is one of the most compelling ideas in your work and one of the most helpful things you have ever written. I wish everyone in the world would read it.

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Thank you, Erin. That means so much!

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💯 Sister, and thank YOU for introducing me to Laura’s work!

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Thank you Laura! Are you free? It’s the question I’ve asked myself from your first book and kept asking until I could say YES!!!

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I love this Laura. I would also have answered yes to all these questions, but for the last 1646 days I’ve only said YES to the last one. There is nothing I treasure more than my sober life. No matter what’s going on - stress, anxiety, kids worries etc I go to bed at night and wake up in the morning eternally grateful for being sober and you and your books have played a massive part in that ❤️

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A very wise therapist once said to me when I wanted her to tell me if I had a drinking problem: Is alcohol more than a beverage for you? Bingo.

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That’s a good one. 🎯

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Amen!!! Thank you for reminding of this again and again - another #9!!

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I was thinking about the term alcoholic this evening and completely agree with your take on the term. I was an alcoholic when I was drinking at one stage, but now that I don’t I don’t think of myself as being defined by alcohol in that way. That said, what I have to remember was how it kept me trapped. Trapped in a relentless cycle bargaining and monitoring. Not free at all. Freedom is sobriety for me too.

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Today, 7/7/23, I turn double digits. TEN years ago this morning I woke up and whispered "help, I can't do this anymore." This essay so appropriately describes where I was at. "It’s being able to actively respond to life instead of just reacting out of fear, shame, or regret. It’s being able to trust yourself to follow through when you make promises and plans. It’s knowing your word actually means something, and moving through your days with some dignity. It’s showing up instead of hiding and telling the truth instead of lying. It’s having command over how you spend your energy, your heart, your life." Thank you Laura for having an impact on my recovery journey. See you in Kripalu.

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Hi Laura. I'm so glad I reread this 5 days before I celebrate a year of sobriety. My emotions are all over the place, as I'm wide awake at this ridiculously early hour when I need to function at school with 10 year olds in a few hours. Ugh. I keep reflecting on the past year, life during active drinking, and how much better life is now. With that said, I really hate calling myself an alcoholic... really hate it. But I do it for one of the reasons you mentioned above. I attend AA meetings and it's what everyone does. I identify as an alcoholic more out of respect for the other members. Do I have alcohol abuse disorder? Absolutely. My life was becoming unmanageable and it was causing lots of tension with my husband & sons. I was beginning to miss work due to hangovers & day drinking. That was certainly a problem! I needed help, and the 1st place I found it was in AA. I relate so much to your story for this reason. By the way, We Are the Luckiest was my 1st quit lit book, and I love It so much! Thank you for writing it from the bottom of my heart:) Back to the "alcoholic" word... I have developed some very special relationships, deep friendships, with ladies I met in AA meetings. I don't know how to get past the identification part of the meeting - "I'm Crystal, I'm an alcoholic." I realize that there are no rules, just suggestions, but I don't want to offend anyone. On November 14, I would love to say, "I'm Crystal, and I'm alcohol free." or any other combination of words that have gone through my head. Gosh, I'm getting emotional as typing this. I would love to hear some advice on an alternative (or not) way to introduce myself at meetings. Thanks in advance:)

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Hi Crystal - I totally get it. I eventually just said, "I'm Laura and I'm in recovery" and that felt better to me. Or, you could say, "I'm Crystal and I'm sober today." I think saying "alcohol-free" in AA meetings would turn some heads and bring on questioning and criticism that's probably not worth it. What do you think?

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You are probably right. I guess I was trying to keep the word "alcohol" in the statement to identify my problem. But why? If there are truly no "rules," then how I identify myself shouldn't really matter. But I'm also quite aware that members of AA, especially those with lots of years, have strong feelings on how things "should" be. I don't want to be seen as a rebel, because that's not what I'm trying to accomplish at all. I truly love the people I've met in AA, I just REALLY hate saying the word alcoholic. I was told it would get easier with time, well it hasn't. I appreciate your suggestion of saying I'm sober today. That feels so much better. Thank you, Laura, for taking the time to reach out and for helping me as I continue to figure out how to live a joyful, sober life:)

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You’re in an AA meeting, so I think the alcohol part is implied 😁.

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I love this. And when I read your thoughts in Push Off From Here is was so helpful. It's helpful to re read and re read these ideas because the other stuff is so ingrained. So, thank you for the honesty and great writing.

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I am so appreciative of you and others like you coming out to the world with this amount of beautiful honesty. I just started listening to Home Podcast about a year ago after reading Quit Like a Woman and have since read sooooo many books that you and Holly recommend on the podcast, and of course have read your books. I truly believe that the Universe gives us just what we need when we need it and I believe that I found you right when I needed to - you are one of my teachers and I appreciate and love you dearly. Thank you! I am over seven months sober from alcohol and cocaine and about four months cannabis-free. I never believed I could feel so free. Thank you for helping me get free!!!

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Yes! Am I free is the best question! I obsessed over whether my problems with alcohol were serious enough to quit. I took many quizzes😂 Finally, I just wanted to be free and have that monkey off my back. One of the best decisions I have ever made. Thank you, Laura❤️

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Beautifully written--again-- your clarity, thoughtfulness, et,all!! So spot on. Thank you!!

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I am free! This really sums up your books and your process. Thank you Laura <3

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You always get right to it for me Laura. When I read We Are the luckiest I was astounded by your honesty. I joined TLC , did The Practice and joined summer sober 90. You are the best.

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You are such a gifted writer . I’ve gotten so much out of your books . I found myself described in your words . I no longer felt alone . It allowed me to drop my shame . I’m 27 days AF today and feeling strong . I’ve tried before . This time I finally feel free . Thank you .

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Even though I still get “drinky” occasionally, being sober for over 2 years is the best kind of freedom!! 🤍🤍🤍

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❤️

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