“I’m going to get in trouble.” Someone’s going to get mad at me” I just started seeing this in myself after 61 years. Thank you for exploring this with an expert for us.
Thank you, Laura & Ingrid! I’m pre-ordering the book now. I’ve never felt so seen in a conversation. I’ve known for years that I orient outwards and fawn and that I want to become more embodied. After many years of therapy, I tried working with a “somatic” therapist on this, and when she’d ask me to orient inwards, I couldn’t do it. My inability just reinforced how there’s something wrong with me. I loved my therapist, so I started performing for her and pretending that I was feeling things in my body, when I really wasn’t. My word for 2025 is “inhabit”… I want nothing more than to be inside of my own experience, and yet it eludes me. This conversation gave me so much hope. Thank you! 💗
I’ve performed for every therapist I’ve had I think. I’m usually more nervous about their feelings when I’m there than my own thank you again Laura for making this available so impactful it makes me look at my my search for healing in peace in a whole new way. Can’t wait to get the book.
This conversation was so incredibly impactful—the dots continued to connect long after the call ended yesterday. Even the word “fawning” has completely shifted in my mind—from internal cringe to something I feel safer to hold tenderly and view closely. I am still excavating decades of subconscious “I’m to blame” and “I’m in trouble” and “I never do it right” (which are especially fun when paired with the belief that you are also somehow responsible for the feelings and experiences of everyone around you. lol.) So it is such sweet relief to hear another explanation to all my inner workings and outer doings that feels even more true (and a hell of a lot better). I’m interested to see how this connects with all my previous a-ha revelations with regard to emotional sobriety, love addiction, trauma loops, INFJ work, etc. I’m about to have a second listen to yesterday’s convo, as my hummingbird heart was beating hard on the live call yesterday (as often happens when I’m exactly where I need to be.) Ingrid, I’ve pre-ordered your book, and one glance at your Substack tells me I might as well pull up a seat (+ weighted blanket :) and park myself there for an entire week. A HUGE thank you to you and the always-incredible/relatable Laura. Appreciated every single word and the natural energy between you two. xo.
“Restoring a healthy fight response”. WOW. This explains 40% of the rocky year I’ve had. You are a treasure, Ingrid! 🤍🤍 Loved Believing Me and really looking forward to your next book. 🥰
“I’m going to get in trouble.” Someone’s going to get mad at me” I just started seeing this in myself after 61 years. Thank you for exploring this with an expert for us.
Thank you, Laura & Ingrid! I’m pre-ordering the book now. I’ve never felt so seen in a conversation. I’ve known for years that I orient outwards and fawn and that I want to become more embodied. After many years of therapy, I tried working with a “somatic” therapist on this, and when she’d ask me to orient inwards, I couldn’t do it. My inability just reinforced how there’s something wrong with me. I loved my therapist, so I started performing for her and pretending that I was feeling things in my body, when I really wasn’t. My word for 2025 is “inhabit”… I want nothing more than to be inside of my own experience, and yet it eludes me. This conversation gave me so much hope. Thank you! 💗
Oh, the performing for therapists! Done it! This stuff runs so deep.
I’ve performed for every therapist I’ve had I think. I’m usually more nervous about their feelings when I’m there than my own thank you again Laura for making this available so impactful it makes me look at my my search for healing in peace in a whole new way. Can’t wait to get the book.
I’ve done it toooooo. We aren’t alone and we don’t have to stay in these patterns ❤️
This conversation was so incredibly impactful—the dots continued to connect long after the call ended yesterday. Even the word “fawning” has completely shifted in my mind—from internal cringe to something I feel safer to hold tenderly and view closely. I am still excavating decades of subconscious “I’m to blame” and “I’m in trouble” and “I never do it right” (which are especially fun when paired with the belief that you are also somehow responsible for the feelings and experiences of everyone around you. lol.) So it is such sweet relief to hear another explanation to all my inner workings and outer doings that feels even more true (and a hell of a lot better). I’m interested to see how this connects with all my previous a-ha revelations with regard to emotional sobriety, love addiction, trauma loops, INFJ work, etc. I’m about to have a second listen to yesterday’s convo, as my hummingbird heart was beating hard on the live call yesterday (as often happens when I’m exactly where I need to be.) Ingrid, I’ve pre-ordered your book, and one glance at your Substack tells me I might as well pull up a seat (+ weighted blanket :) and park myself there for an entire week. A HUGE thank you to you and the always-incredible/relatable Laura. Appreciated every single word and the natural energy between you two. xo.
This was amazing! I can’t wait for the next one!
“Restoring a healthy fight response”. WOW. This explains 40% of the rocky year I’ve had. You are a treasure, Ingrid! 🤍🤍 Loved Believing Me and really looking forward to your next book. 🥰
Thank you so much!
That was really great. So, so good--and resonant. She's fabulous. I pre-ordered the book.