Yessss!! 46 year-old personal trainer here. Please spread the gospel...eat those carbs & lift heavy shit! The mental benefits alone are worth it. Many women tell me they are afraid they'll get "bulky." I'm here to tell you, you will not get bulky. Women have to put very specific things into their bodies to even try to get bulky if they wanted. So buy that bread and pick up the irons 😉
What's so nice about what you experienced and wrote here is the reminder that we live in BODIES - fleshly, corporeal, physical bodies. And as we recover and grow in all the ways that we want to and need to emotionally and intellectually and spiritually, there is an undeniable physical aspect to growth and recovery that is also quite beautiful and necessary because we live in bodies. Embracing this physical aspect complements and enhances our pursuits of the intangible goal of being better humans - to ourselves and others.
To quote the end of your article...."I think it’s important to push against our edges regularly." Using that as part of my montra each morning, as it's felt needed lately. Perhaps I'm reading too much into the weight lifting, but there's a parallell to that and overcoming drinking, life, and other heavy things in life. If one can quite the disease, overcome life struggles, and lift the weights physically and mentally, we can all legit do anything and become even better people because of it. Wonderful article.
“Sturdier scaffolding.” YES. I know consistency is key, but I can enter my gym feeling soft and blah and walk back out an hour later feeling like Linda Hamilton circa 1992. And also love the Arnold posters/rock/gritty vibe. Every time I do shoulder press I hear Arnie’s voice calling it the “three-headed dragon.” 😂 I’m still working on some of the mental reprogramming regarding my overall health + fitness as I’ve gotten older, but I really relate to this whole experience. It’s a trip how so many of us came to believe we should not eat prior to a morning workout. But then again I also believed Snackwells, diet pills and Marlborough Lights were working for me, too, so there you go. A few times lately I’ve had to stop my workout all together and go find a vending machine as my blood sugar dropped dangerously quick thanks to not eating first. I am most certainly not the same gal who would jump cardio machine to cardio machine. And RUN from a bagel! Thanks for the podcast recs! All really good stuff!! 💪🏻
Yes to Linda Hamilton, she is what I aspired to back in those old Gold's Gym days in southern CA with the hard rock blaring and MC Hammer pants abounding around me. God, I loved that vibe and it sounds like Laura has found an OG option (so jealous). It's good to know they are out there. I need to add this to my "must have" list for relocation which is slowly coming together.
This inspires me to do something. I'm 46, never been into sports (or exercise for that matter). I've been naturally thin so I didn't think about it too much, but I have been feeling weak and tired all the time. I had NO idea how to start - this is super helpful!
I would highly recommend getting a personal trainer, even for a small amount of time. It'll help ease you into more confidence. Also, try some different classes: yoga, pilates, kickboxing, etc. and see what you think is fun. It's hard to walk into those places being new but they are trained to be welcoming and accommodating to newcomers (if they aren't, it's not for you!). Just try a few things!
In addition to a trainer, I would recommend pickleball. That was the sport that unlocked so much for me last year in regards to reuniting with my body. EAsy and fun at any level, provides "social light" interactions and is great for the mind-body connection. Now that I'm well underway with that obsession, I've decided to add back in strength training. There are many paths, you will find yours!
This could be helpful for anyone who may need an even softer entry: I'll be 55 next month and am post-menopausal by a few years. I've really hated feeling that I've lost all control over what my body is doing despite having been a consistent (cardio) exerciser for most of my adult life. I had started lifting weights at home but I'd yet to adopt a consistent program. I was telling my D.O. this and she suggested that I just carry weights with me on my long walks. So either carrying my dumbbells, using those handy strap-on ankle and wrist weights or even putting heavier weights in a backpack. I've been doing that for a few months and the difference I feel has been profound enough that it's inspired me to now start a more specific lifting protocol. Now I have to figure out how to eat, so thank you for the references. What I've been doing for the last 15 or so years is no longer satisfying. xo.
Yes!! I started doing Barre last year at age 61, during my first year of quitting alcohol. It felt so necessary to work on my physical strength in tandem with my mental/emotional growth. (Plus it gave me something to DO) Thanks for sharing this aspect of your journey 💜
Thanks for these essays on lifting heavy things Laura - I have been trying to get into it (also love Rebecca Kennedy!) but it's been a series of starts and stops. I let out a dry laugh at "intermittent fasting bullshit" because I am currently re-learning/deprogramming myself of allllll the diet culture *things* in a 12 week long small women's group course (it has the same structure and feeling as Deeper Work which was soooo fundamental in my early sobriety and I'm loving the course and hoping it gives me the same strong foundation in diet/binge eating recovery as your course gave me in sobriety). I think the starting very slow and creating some sort of consistency is the key for me. Thank you for sharing your journey and process
Laura, you have motivated me! I’ve been doing heavy cardio since the pandemic and I love it but I’ve felt stuck and haven’t been able to get my body into ‘good’ shape. And I’m probably not eating enough— being on diets since 14, those ‘rules’ become so ingrained. I can relate with “feeling like a 13 year old all over again” when stepping into a gym. As a kid, gym class was a very difficult experience and I’m 37 and still get transported back there. Not to mention the intimidation of the free weights section. 😂 But I’ve been doing Peloton strength workouts and feel SO MUCH STRONGER. It’s not even the physical strength… it’s like it makes me mentally stronger and embodied. I think joining a gym is next for me… thanks for such a wonderful writing… as always!
I get all of this! I started strength training 3 years ago at a rehab-style gym (as I fell off a deck whilst drinking and sprained both ankles badly and needed intense physio - the gym is a bit daggy but I went, I had to strengthen my ankles so I could walk again). My ankles got better really slowly and I got stronger over 18 months - geez it was slow. But I am back hiking and have even started hiking fast = trail running. Then, a few months ago I serendipidiously came across reformer pilates - I would NEVER have done this previously - I'd have said that the music, the more-coordinated bodies in the room, the mirrors were too much. But the real reason was that I wouldn't have been confident enough. But then I went along, already stronger from a few years at this medical-rehab gym and I can do it and I love it. I am so so much stronger in my core and mind now. It's taken 3 years and me having to adjust to being patient. I am now sober and strong. AND who knows whats next! I love that part. I'm now open to new things.
This is so great, Natalie. First, those injuries must've been brutal. I'm sorry that happened to you. I started going to a pilates studio with my daughter this year and it's surprisingly fun. I'm so glad you've found something that you love!
I love your use of the word “sturdy”. I’m sure you’ve seen/heard/read Dr. Becky. On a recent podcast (that I won’t name🙃) she used that word to describe what parents should aspire to be. It’s so healing to become the sturdy adult that WE need in our lives. Really cool that strength training is bringing that part of you more alive. 💗
Yes to Dr. Stacy Sims!! I'm doing her Power Happens 12 week program and after years of boot camp classes and half-assing half marathons, her program feels amazing! Finally getting some traction. Yay us!!!
Yes to lifting weights! I love, love, love my small group weight training at the gym and we all crack up when the trainer says, "Look at you, you are getting so strong!." And I say, "Riley, I'm doing this to look like a supermodel, not to gain strength." ha ha ha
Thank you so much for this entire post & everything you post for that matter. I've just started lifting & have felt more empowered for sure which I will need in coming months as I navigate some big changes as well. I've been MIA on your posts for a couple of months but I thought the last I read you were planning a wedding? I'm so sorry but so glad if it's what you wanted which it seems it is! Best to you!
Yessss!! 46 year-old personal trainer here. Please spread the gospel...eat those carbs & lift heavy shit! The mental benefits alone are worth it. Many women tell me they are afraid they'll get "bulky." I'm here to tell you, you will not get bulky. Women have to put very specific things into their bodies to even try to get bulky if they wanted. So buy that bread and pick up the irons 😉
SCREAM IT!
What's so nice about what you experienced and wrote here is the reminder that we live in BODIES - fleshly, corporeal, physical bodies. And as we recover and grow in all the ways that we want to and need to emotionally and intellectually and spiritually, there is an undeniable physical aspect to growth and recovery that is also quite beautiful and necessary because we live in bodies. Embracing this physical aspect complements and enhances our pursuits of the intangible goal of being better humans - to ourselves and others.
Yes, yes, yes. Exactly.
To quote the end of your article...."I think it’s important to push against our edges regularly." Using that as part of my montra each morning, as it's felt needed lately. Perhaps I'm reading too much into the weight lifting, but there's a parallell to that and overcoming drinking, life, and other heavy things in life. If one can quite the disease, overcome life struggles, and lift the weights physically and mentally, we can all legit do anything and become even better people because of it. Wonderful article.
You're not reading too much into it Matthew, that's exactly how I feel.
Loved all of this and thanks for the link to Stacy - "women are not small men" - I just sent that to my son 😂
The best. WOMEN ARE NOT SMALL MEN.
“Sturdier scaffolding.” YES. I know consistency is key, but I can enter my gym feeling soft and blah and walk back out an hour later feeling like Linda Hamilton circa 1992. And also love the Arnold posters/rock/gritty vibe. Every time I do shoulder press I hear Arnie’s voice calling it the “three-headed dragon.” 😂 I’m still working on some of the mental reprogramming regarding my overall health + fitness as I’ve gotten older, but I really relate to this whole experience. It’s a trip how so many of us came to believe we should not eat prior to a morning workout. But then again I also believed Snackwells, diet pills and Marlborough Lights were working for me, too, so there you go. A few times lately I’ve had to stop my workout all together and go find a vending machine as my blood sugar dropped dangerously quick thanks to not eating first. I am most certainly not the same gal who would jump cardio machine to cardio machine. And RUN from a bagel! Thanks for the podcast recs! All really good stuff!! 💪🏻
Snackwells!💀
Yes to Linda Hamilton, she is what I aspired to back in those old Gold's Gym days in southern CA with the hard rock blaring and MC Hammer pants abounding around me. God, I loved that vibe and it sounds like Laura has found an OG option (so jealous). It's good to know they are out there. I need to add this to my "must have" list for relocation which is slowly coming together.
This inspires me to do something. I'm 46, never been into sports (or exercise for that matter). I've been naturally thin so I didn't think about it too much, but I have been feeling weak and tired all the time. I had NO idea how to start - this is super helpful!
I would highly recommend getting a personal trainer, even for a small amount of time. It'll help ease you into more confidence. Also, try some different classes: yoga, pilates, kickboxing, etc. and see what you think is fun. It's hard to walk into those places being new but they are trained to be welcoming and accommodating to newcomers (if they aren't, it's not for you!). Just try a few things!
In addition to a trainer, I would recommend pickleball. That was the sport that unlocked so much for me last year in regards to reuniting with my body. EAsy and fun at any level, provides "social light" interactions and is great for the mind-body connection. Now that I'm well underway with that obsession, I've decided to add back in strength training. There are many paths, you will find yours!
This could be helpful for anyone who may need an even softer entry: I'll be 55 next month and am post-menopausal by a few years. I've really hated feeling that I've lost all control over what my body is doing despite having been a consistent (cardio) exerciser for most of my adult life. I had started lifting weights at home but I'd yet to adopt a consistent program. I was telling my D.O. this and she suggested that I just carry weights with me on my long walks. So either carrying my dumbbells, using those handy strap-on ankle and wrist weights or even putting heavier weights in a backpack. I've been doing that for a few months and the difference I feel has been profound enough that it's inspired me to now start a more specific lifting protocol. Now I have to figure out how to eat, so thank you for the references. What I've been doing for the last 15 or so years is no longer satisfying. xo.
Love this Sondra. Thank you for sharing with us!
Yes!! I started doing Barre last year at age 61, during my first year of quitting alcohol. It felt so necessary to work on my physical strength in tandem with my mental/emotional growth. (Plus it gave me something to DO) Thanks for sharing this aspect of your journey 💜
Love that Carolyn. :)
Thanks for these essays on lifting heavy things Laura - I have been trying to get into it (also love Rebecca Kennedy!) but it's been a series of starts and stops. I let out a dry laugh at "intermittent fasting bullshit" because I am currently re-learning/deprogramming myself of allllll the diet culture *things* in a 12 week long small women's group course (it has the same structure and feeling as Deeper Work which was soooo fundamental in my early sobriety and I'm loving the course and hoping it gives me the same strong foundation in diet/binge eating recovery as your course gave me in sobriety). I think the starting very slow and creating some sort of consistency is the key for me. Thank you for sharing your journey and process
So glad to hear Megan!
Laura, you have motivated me! I’ve been doing heavy cardio since the pandemic and I love it but I’ve felt stuck and haven’t been able to get my body into ‘good’ shape. And I’m probably not eating enough— being on diets since 14, those ‘rules’ become so ingrained. I can relate with “feeling like a 13 year old all over again” when stepping into a gym. As a kid, gym class was a very difficult experience and I’m 37 and still get transported back there. Not to mention the intimidation of the free weights section. 😂 But I’ve been doing Peloton strength workouts and feel SO MUCH STRONGER. It’s not even the physical strength… it’s like it makes me mentally stronger and embodied. I think joining a gym is next for me… thanks for such a wonderful writing… as always!
GREG! DOUBLE FIST PUMPS OVER HERE!
I get all of this! I started strength training 3 years ago at a rehab-style gym (as I fell off a deck whilst drinking and sprained both ankles badly and needed intense physio - the gym is a bit daggy but I went, I had to strengthen my ankles so I could walk again). My ankles got better really slowly and I got stronger over 18 months - geez it was slow. But I am back hiking and have even started hiking fast = trail running. Then, a few months ago I serendipidiously came across reformer pilates - I would NEVER have done this previously - I'd have said that the music, the more-coordinated bodies in the room, the mirrors were too much. But the real reason was that I wouldn't have been confident enough. But then I went along, already stronger from a few years at this medical-rehab gym and I can do it and I love it. I am so so much stronger in my core and mind now. It's taken 3 years and me having to adjust to being patient. I am now sober and strong. AND who knows whats next! I love that part. I'm now open to new things.
This is so great, Natalie. First, those injuries must've been brutal. I'm sorry that happened to you. I started going to a pilates studio with my daughter this year and it's surprisingly fun. I'm so glad you've found something that you love!
I love your use of the word “sturdy”. I’m sure you’ve seen/heard/read Dr. Becky. On a recent podcast (that I won’t name🙃) she used that word to describe what parents should aspire to be. It’s so healing to become the sturdy adult that WE need in our lives. Really cool that strength training is bringing that part of you more alive. 💗
Yes, I really like Dr. Becky!
Just got a PT and doing resistance training for the first time at 54. It certainly does give a nice dose of happiness after each session 💜
Yes to Dr. Stacy Sims!! I'm doing her Power Happens 12 week program and after years of boot camp classes and half-assing half marathons, her program feels amazing! Finally getting some traction. Yay us!!!
Yay us!
Yes to lifting weights! I love, love, love my small group weight training at the gym and we all crack up when the trainer says, "Look at you, you are getting so strong!." And I say, "Riley, I'm doing this to look like a supermodel, not to gain strength." ha ha ha
Thank you so much for this entire post & everything you post for that matter. I've just started lifting & have felt more empowered for sure which I will need in coming months as I navigate some big changes as well. I've been MIA on your posts for a couple of months but I thought the last I read you were planning a wedding? I'm so sorry but so glad if it's what you wanted which it seems it is! Best to you!