The Dig List: January 2025
Flow Club for productivity, my book writing schedule, some excellent reads, and more. (Also, did Mel Robbins steal "Let Them?")
If you’ve got at least one year of sobriety and are ready to do the deeper work, consider joining me for The Sober Life, starting February 3rd. This 5-month program addresses the core challenges in emotional sobriety, including relationships, self-trust, purpose, and emotional resilience. Learn more and register.
Well, this year came in screaming, eh? I didn’t write last week because nobody needed more noise, and I also needed to get some real traction on my book writing as I’m building my muscles back up. Book writing is a very specific mindset and form of fitness for me, and it’s…hard. More on that soon.
I’m not telling you why I didn’t write last week to apologize but to let you know that will happen sometimes. I generally publish weekly, but I’ll never put something out just to check the box. If you want to know what else to expect here in the coming year (we’ve got a lot of new folks, hello!), read this.
Lastly, before I get into things I dig, here’s something I hate: Mel Robbins allegedly plagiarized her “Let Them” from a viral poem by Cassie B. Phillips. I’ve never understood MR’s appeal, but so what; plenty of public figures aren’t my thing. In general, I have a distaste for what I see as a problematic ecosystem of self-help/personal development folks who repackage overly simplistic “advice” that has already been said a million times, act as if it’s revolutionary, and then circle jerk around each others’ content and appear on each others’ podcasts and get each other on bestseller lists. But even that part is mostly just annoying. This—if it is true, and all signs point there—is just straight-up stealing and exploitation. We’ll see if MR or her publisher, Hay House, says anything. So far it’s been crickets. Be sure to read the follow-up: Can Mel Robbins Trademark Your Words? Let’s Find Out. The receipts are suss.
What’s The Dig List?
Sharing stuff I love is my favorite thing, so instead of trying to squeeze recommendations into the other newsletters, I started a series called The Dig List. It’s a monthly roundup of things I’m digging: books, podcasts, music, cultural moments, art, products. Read past ones here.
The Dig List: January 2025
Tools
A friend told me about Flow Club, and I’m hooked. It’s “a virtual co-working space that helps people stay focused and productive,” which sounded not like my jam at all, but it’s helping me get real work done on my book (last week, I logged ten hours during a packed, weird week). You essentially schedule and join “flow sessions” that range from 30 to 180 minutes, and there’s something about making an ‘appointment’ with someone and having the other folks there working alongside you that works for me. Get a two-week free trial with this link (if you become a paid member, I get a free month, fyi).
On the book-writing note, I thought I’d share a visual of my cute, color-coded schedule. I’ll write more about this and the various ways I’ve tried to organize this book, as well as my others, and what has ultimately worked to that end and what hasn’t, soon.
A note: I have my daughter every other week, and the difference between those weeks is huge. Hence, two schedules.
Shows
Landman finished strong. Again, I didn’t think I’d be into a lot of screen time with Billy Bob Thornton, who plays the main character, but he’s perfect. Plus: John Hamm always in everything forever amen.
The Pitt, a new emergency room drama on Max, is exactly what I need right now. It's not the most sophisticated writing, sometimes it’s a little too on the nose, but it’s fast-paced and entertaining, and I think the main guy is hot.
Next, I’m diving into Say Nothing. Have you seen it?
Books
I’m embarrassed to say Heartburn by Nora Ephron is my first Nora Ephron novel. But I’m so happy to say it is like the most delicious candy! Or maybe more like candy and buttered movie theater popcorn at the same time. Like Milk Duds in warm, buttery movie popcorn. With a big fountain Diet Coke. Thank you, H, for the rec.
It must be book-writing season because I’m listening to On Writing by Stephen King again. Part memoir, part craft advice, it’s entertaining, fascinating (did you know he originally threw Carrie in the trash, and his wife pulled it out, smoothed out the cigarette-ash-covered pages, and convinced him to keep going, and that that book was what broke him onto the scene?) and helpful. Plus, he’s funny.
For all my book lists, visit my Bookshop.org storefront.
Writing
Author
with the best medicine in this beautiful essay about the importance of fallow days as a writer. on what success means as an artist and what it means to live the wrong life.Eliza McLamb on how much we really need to know these days when it comes to the news, echoing many of my thoughts coming in next week’s newsletter.
Links and Other Stuff
The only political news I’m getting on purpose now is through Tangle, a truly non-partisan, subscriber-supported outfit. I get 1-2 emails a week. It’s excellent.
If you’re a big Kindle reader like me, BookBub is awesome. You get a list of very discounted titles every day. But also, PLEASE, if you like a book, support the author and pay for it at full price in other formats, even if you just give the copies away.
If you haven’t seen this story break about Neil Gaiman joining the list of terrible sexual predators and Amanda Palmer assisting him in his efforts yet, I’m sorry to be the bearer. TW: very hard read. (I tried to make it a gift article; not sure if it worked.)
Rick Rubin explains why the audience should come last. Related, I stumbled on his podcast, Tetragrammaton, and this two-part conversation with David Whyte is extraordinary. Part 1, Part 2. He’s got quite the wild guest list on the show, from musicians like Ezra Koenig and John Mayer to actors like Al Pacino and Will Smith to scientists like Dr. Jay Battacharya and tech bros like Peter Theil.
And lastly, I’ll repeat these because I keep getting questions about it in my DMs on Instagram (after I post clips of my workouts). If you’re considering getting into strength training, which I cannot recommend enough, I wrote about how I got started and what it’s looked like here and here.
xo,
Laura
In Case You Missed It
Attractions of Deprivation - Pulling the thread on my pattern of attracting unavailable men.
What to Expect Here in 2025 - What I'll write about, what I won't, why I have paid subscriptions, and more.
Freedom Isn’t Free - On the tradeoffs of sobriety.
Explore The Archives
You are reading Love Story, a weekly newsletter about relationships, recovery, and writing from Laura McKowen. Laura is the founder of The Luckiest Club, an international sobriety support community, and the bestselling author of two books, We Are The Luckiest: The Surprising Magic of a Sober Life and Push Off from Here: 9 Essential Truths to Get You Through Sobriety (and Everything Else).
You can give a gift subscription here.
“Let Them” I mean duh… why is this so revelatory??? It’s like the parenting book “Blessing of the Skinned Knee” about letting your kids learn a bit from life. Saw the author speak when my kids were young— all my friends were raving… again I was like well Yeah a DUH?!?! But it really opened my eyes to how there are actual geographic differences in child rearing. It saved me a lot of self doubt as a midwestern gal mothering on the east coast. Oooh an Landman say no more. How Billy Bob Thornton can come off as sexy I not sure but he does!
The Mel Robbins thing is really bothering me. Like, infiltrates-my-brain-at-random-times level bothering me. I was never into her to begin with, but this really moves her from annoying to harmful. I'm pissed and I wish I could do something more (than sharing the story as far and wide as my network will allow). Glad to see you writing about it. I hope the pressure increases.